A trip to the nude beach

Written by Josh on Wednesday, September 28 2011

Okay so let's start by making it clear that i had no idea what to expect. the end of my 5k trail run through the dunes took me to a trailhead at the beach where going right meant clothes and left meant none. i compromised. i went left, but kept my clothes covering my "musn't touch its." at least, this is what gregory's grandma called them. suddenly, i realize i must explain. gregory's grandma never refered to my specific genetalia as "musn't touch its." this, we found out on yet another hilarious ride home from a show, is what she called "privates" when Gregory was a boy. glad we got that cleared up. so back to the beach.

I refuse to go into too much detail but i would like to make three observations.

  1. apparently the men either never heard of, or completely disregarded that little covenant between abraham and God.
  2. ladies, excessive amounts of sun on your breasts will leave them looking like the leather on a well-worn 1957 rawlings ball glove.
  3. the man with the biggest penis on the beach must 
    a.) walk slowly to and from the water 
    b.) never lay down, but continue to stand by his towel the entire time and 
    c.) occasionally place the hands on the small of his back arching it, thus projecting his uncut even further out in front.

It was an awkward experience for me. i felt as if i had stumbled upon a del webb housing no-holds-barred day trip to the beach.

On a completely different note

helping gregory during his master class yesterday at the high school in rotterdam was incredible. gregory was great with the students and they were great with him. they had obviously worked very hard in composing their original pieces to share with us and about 270 other people at the end of the day. the heartbreaking lyrical substance went far beyond that of many of their favorite pop stars. while some sang of hope and following their dreams, others sang of loneliness, family struggles, and this hard world. one lyric, that sticks to me like gregory's burnt potatoes to the pot, came from a young woman who sought to re-connect with her father and sang "cause i'm your daughter and i love you anyways." her mother sat beyond us and the reservoir of tears opened on her cheeks. following these performances with one of our own was a privilege and an honor. my favorite part was playing along with a song gregory and sky wrote that night for a student who had written beautiful lyrics but couldn't find the music to do them justice. he surprised her and in front of hundreds of people and her peers, he sang the collaboration and brought her to tears. it was in that moment that i was reminded of how much i love working with genuinely good people.

and now a few differences between american and dutch high school students

  1. unlike the dutch principals (headmasters or whatever they are called), american administrators would never leave the campus to the run of the students during a restaurant break, miles away, for dinner. when asked about this, the principal said "what do you mean? they are young adults right?" when we returned, they were in the classrooms working together and practicing their music.
  2. there are no smoking areas for teachers AND students back home.
  3. 16yr olds drinking beer with the teachers, principals, and staff ON CAMPUS would never be allowed back home!
  4. from what i could tell, all of this responsibility seems to make the students responsible

one last topic: rotterdam.

i love rotterdam! holland as a whole is a beautiful country. there is, however, one major problem. holland is below sea level. years ago the dutch decided to be the moses of the world but instead of parting the water and walking through it, they parted it and then built their country on the dry land... also know as sand. (i totally support this decision. it was about time that somebody showed the ocean who was boss). the one parable the dutch didn't consult was the one where God tells people to built their house on the rock, not the sand. bad foundations and 300 hundred year old buildings equall a country that is leaning in one direction or the other no matter where you look...except rotterdam. about 70 years ago, rotterdam decided that the traditional doll-house looking dutch home was no longer in style. the city completely remodeled thus modernizing one of the largest ports in the world. some people argue that this occured because the germans bombed the hell out of the city during world war ii. i tend to think it was because they are so fashion forward.

tomorrow night (thursday) we co-headline the main room at paradiso. a.j. croce hits at 7:30 and we hit at 9:00.

see you there.

sincerely, josh

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